I always worry about Emmeline is social situations but they are usually smaller groups so she can hold her own OK. But in that cafeteria there are hundreds of kids. Hundreds of noisy kids. None of the kids have been mean to her but kids get frustrated easily. As I walk away I know Emmeline can't hear. I hope the other kids are nice. I know when they talk to her in that noisy room she wont understand what they are saying. She will do her best to fake it but, eventually the other kid realizes she doesn't know what they said and they move on. Not moving on to be mean or anything but if they have to choose between a friend who they can't understand and who can't understand them and a friend who can...it's pretty clear but it's just difficult knowing. That they will move on and Emmeline wont know why. Or maybe she does and she feel rejected? Maybe they will be mean about it, maybe they wont be. But I don't know because I wont be there.
It's almost unbearable walking back to my car. I want to stay and translate for her. I want to help her friends understand her. I want to help her not be frustrated. I want it to not be so difficult. But it is. Like so many things in her life, she has to work harder to get less. I think she is realizing that. Which only makes me feel worse walking away.