Sometimes after a long period of stress or sadness I get this ache. It's an odd sort of ache. Kind of like that pain you get then you haven't moved a muscle for a while and it starts to stiffen up. That is kind of what it feels like. I figured out what it was the other day. My happy is aching.
I know that sounds ridiculous and weird, but that is the best way I can think of to describe it. It's like my happy emotion is always there but kind of gets pushed to the back and the stress/pain gets all the stimulation. Then after a while it gets antsy/jealous. It wants stimulation too. Then my emotions have a nice little battle. Stress gets a little more stressy because it stresses me out that I feel like I need to feel happy which in turn makes me feel less happy. It's a sick little cycle.
I've tired to do a few things to kick start it but so far nothing has panned out. It seems like a fluke when it finally happens which is super frustrating! It's like I have to trick myself into it because if I see it coming I inevitably get stressed!
2 comments:
It sucks that your awesomely saddening descriptions are about yourself, but they are still pretty awesome.
Thanks. They freak people out sometimes but it really helps typing them out. Like I'm tricking the trick :)
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